Things that I feel I just really need to think about.

What are the things I need in a close friend and/or significant other?

  1. kindness
  2. genuine empathy
  3. consideration for others
  4. maturity
  5. honesty
  6. trustworthiness

What are the things I need only in a significant other (but not necessarily in a friend)?

  1. deep sense of purpose
  2. high intelligence
  3. height (the more shallow criteria)
  4. emotional intelligence (ability to understand and express one’s own emotions)
  5. humility
  6. openness to Indian ‘culture’
  7. being fun

What are things I don’t ‘need’ in a significant other but would like to have?

  1. actual understanding of Indian culture
  2. romanticism
  3. pensiveness
  4. bookishness
  5. social intelligence
  6. amiableness
  7. some kind of spiritual/cosmic awareness

So now that these have been established, I guess the question is: How much am I/should I be willing to settle? Is it reasonable to expect all these qualities, especially in a significant other? What if someone I like or want to get romantically involved with has all or most of these qualities, but lacks a sense of humility? What if he completely lacks the supposedly “less” important qualities, such as amiableness? Are any of those grounds for cancellation? Are my standards just too high? Is it okay for me to still date someone who I know isn’t completely right for me?

Or that’s what being young is for, right? Maybe it’s okay to dive into what’s doomed from the start. Maybe settling is alright if it fulfills some temporary needs.


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